I know your not reading this right now, but I am writing in the off chance that you accidently open it without deleting it and get a few paragraphs into the letter without realizing its me.

I never deserved you and you always knew it and so did I. I tried only to call once in while, not too much, and I tried not to get too close . And then you invited me to your party... I had never gotten invited to anywhere in my life... No parties...I was too much of a loser...and I was so happy ... My mom drove me and I got inside your house...You had said I was worth it..

That I was worth it...

That I wasn't just a person you thought was funny when I made a fool of myself...That I wasn't just your entertainment...And your friends treated me like a part of the group...and I got to the movie theater with your friends...Your mom spent 38$ on snacks...And then we went back to your house from the movie ....And went to the backyard and I wouldn't join in...I wouldn't be a part of the group...I couldn't just have fun I have to be stupid and defensive.

Kristina you know that when we talked on the phone sometime I always talked about not having regrets...This is the one thing I regret...I know I have lost my chance with you...But I hope that one day, when I'm not as evil and mean I will find a person as beautiful as you to walk beside...So I'm ripping up your number...And I wont talk to you again or bother you...And I'll try to forget everything...Your birthday...Your favorite shirt...Your cats names...Your favorite food, color, show, song, person, day...I'll forget visine...And get out of your way

Just another face in the crowd,