I know you had your reasons for doing what you did, and I respect them. I was told you got scared cause you've never had a close a friend as me, and all you could do was push me away. How do you think I fell, you were the same for me, I've known most of my friends since I was three, and I've never felt the same closeness and connection as I did with you. And when you stepped out of my life in the manner that you did, I was devastated and still am a bit. None of my other friends understand the grief that I am feeling. I have been hurt by many in my life, but this by far hurts the most, and that is what makes me the most upset.

We became friends so fast, we had an unconscious connection neither of us were aware of, and as fast as you came into my life you stepped out. It was a blur, and I'm still so confused about it. Today I got my closure I finally got a response from you, that I asked for earlier and it took one of my other friends having to tell you off for you to give it to me and I thank them for that. I also thank you for giving me your reasons. Just to let you know, I thought it was scary too, that we were so close, but I didn't want it to end, I loved it too much for that. I honestly don't think after all the hurt and the pain this has put me through I could hate you, it's humanly impossible for me, cause I have tried to, I thought it would ease my pain. But I couldn't and it didn't. I tried to pretend to make it go away for both our sake but it just didn't, it was always there, because well, I never told anyone this, but I started to miss you like hell, and I still do.

I hope in the future our problems can work themselves out, because I think we were the best two of friends our school has every seen, and ever will. We were like two of the same people, when we were around each other we both felt invincible, and it was a great feeling. Were so alike, I haven't spoken word to you in months but I can still walk by you in the hall and know exactly what your thinking, and that scares the hell out of me. My life has literally crumbled around me in the past months, and this incident has made me stronger emotionally.

You know as well as I do, that this is your problem and it's not my fault, but it feels like it is. I hope I didn't hurt you in any way, because that again is not what I want to do. As you know from the letter you did actually receive, I loved you so much as a friend, and it broke my heart when you left, I thought I needed you, but I guess I didn't. I hope our friendship did mean something to you at one time, because it meant a hell of a lot to me, and no one will ever understand why. We were closer than I think some could even imagine, I don't know, we just had a bond that even in not being friends is not broken. I know you do think about me because I've been told you ask about me which means you still care too, and I still think about you, but I'm always getting told about you so I don't have to wonder.

I just hope you know, I'm here in the future when you become ready. You said yourself you were being irrational, and immature, when you become ready to try to even say a word to me I'll be there, because I will always treasure what we did have together. You were on of my best friends and you taught me a lot of things about people and life, and I thank you for that. I thank you for the time that we were friends, all the laughs you provided me with, the ups and downs in our life's that we helped each other through, the grief we shared, the hatred we shared, the gossip we shared, the love we shared, the advice we shared, always knowing someone was there to lean on and most of all the greatness of all our time together. If your ever in doubt about our friendship, just remember the altered lyrics to "On my Own" that we made, and the poster I gave you for your birthday. I still care about you, and wish you the very best in life if we do not become friends again. You will always have a place in my heart, and I will always remember you.

Here when your ready,