That last letter I wrote you. That very long, emotional email, the one you ignored. It was very hard for me to write that. By the end of it...I was crying so hard. The tears were streaming down my face.

Why?? I hate having to explain why, because...I'd like to think you would know.

I was crying...because...I was remembering how things were...and by the end of the letter, I had realized that things were never going to be the same.

And...that hurt a lot. You have no fucking idea how much that thought hurts me...because...you just have no feelings at all towards me anymore.

Why did things change so much, George?? We were peas an' carrots. We were eerie. I was going to wave at you from Mars, and you were "going to be soooooo proud to call you my best friend, Sarah." We were going to grow up and be neighbors, and be friends, and dorks forever.

And now...now I'm not sure if we'll be friends tomorrow.

I love you so fucking much...and it hurts a lot. It hurts so much to get dumped by your best friend. To have your email's ignored. To have you emotions and heart pretty much trampled.

I gave you a lot George. I opened up to you. I shared myself, my dreams, everything. If I had known things were going to end up like this...I never would have done that. For a while, I just wanted to crawl back into my shell, and never talk to anyone again.

There are a lot of things I wouldn't have done. I wouldn't have kissed you, or complimented your eyes, or hugged you, touched you, loved you.

I kind of gave you my innocence. You were my first kiss...my first good male friend...and probably the third 'real' friend I ever had. And...you abused that George. You knew how hard it was for me to open up like that, and all you managed to do in return was hurt me.

I don't know why your feelings changed for me all of a sudden. Did I do something?? Or was everything you said to me, one big lie??

If you hate me George, and never want to see me again...then just fucking tell me, instead of making excuses, and ignoring my e-mails. Just fucking tell me. It hurts so much, because I have no idea how you feel, and what you think of me. That's the worst thing. Having no idea...and...I'm crying again. Why am I fucking crying over someone who hurt me so much??

I wish I could just hate you...and it would be over. But...I can't hate you. I hate what you've put me through lately. And I hate the fact that this letter, like all the others, will go unread, and will be disregarded...but...I've actually gotten used to that.

Adieu