I've been avoiding this for years. I've hidden this for so long that to say it now makes me feel naked. I haven't been exactly forthcoming with you in a really long time, nearly 20 years, and this doesn't feel right. And, please, don't have a stroke, Dad, I know CPR but I don't want to do it on you right now.

OK, here's the thing - I'm gay.

Now, that doesn't change your life at all. And I'm the same person now as I was 5 minutes ago before you knew. And, yes, I know good and well that you think that now I'm gonna go to hell for this. Well, 5 minutes ago you thought I was gonna go to hell for a lot of other stuff - what's the difference? I know you wanted grandkids... well, my sister just got married, and maybe she will produce offspring for you to spoil. I never did plan on it for myself.

No, I'm not seeing anyone right now. And if I were, would she be welcome here? Would you let her come here for Christmas dinner? Would you freak out if I held her hand?

No, your life doesn't have to change. I won't make you join P-Flag and march down the street holding a sign. No, I don't expect anything from you. I just got tired of pretending to be something I'm not around you. And I'm tired of lying, modifying my girlfriends' names into boys' names. And I want you to know me. I am your daughter, after all, and even though I left your house 12 years ago, You are still my parents, and I love you both.

I thought I didn't need you, I thought I could live my life separate from you, and I probably could, but I realize that you're getting older now, and I don't want to miss out on the time we have left to spend together. I want to be closer to you. And for that to happen, you needed more information.

What you do with that information is up to you.

I love you

Mariana