I think everyone has been in my position at one time or another. I've been at both ends.

For me, it started with Billy, the man I dated for four years and had vowed to marry. After you date someone, anyone, that long, the two of you become one in a sense. One is never referred to without the other and when speaking to one, you are more commonly speaking to both. People never knew me as just Evonne. More often then not it was Evonne and Billy, or Billy and Evonne.

After all, we were the "perfect couple" for a very long time.

Billy and I have been separated now for over a year and a half, but today I realized just exactly how long we were together when a friend I hadn't seen in a very long time asked me how he was doing, and when the wedding was to be. I was a bit embarrassed at first but after a brief moment of speechlessness from being unsure how to answer a question like that, I politely smiled and explained that he and I were no longer an "item," after which the tables of embarrassment turned.

It made me think just how long it had been Billy and Evonne, and how many people knew us as a pair, a couple. It made me think about names and how so often when two names are paired together they become set in stone, and that because of this there will always be someone asking, "How's Billy?" in every walk of my life.

For awhile I thought, only me ... this kind of thing only happens to me. But it doesn't. I started thinking about how many of my friends were a part of a "classic couple," and how many of those couples are still together today, and how many are not.

There's Joe and Dana, Crystal and Brad, Karena and Karl, all still together. And there's Chris and Sam, Ed and Lesley, John and Lesley, Jarrod and Mina, John and Mindy, and you and Laura, who were together long enough that the pairing of names still comes up in day-to-day conversation. People still ask one how the other is faring.

It was when I started thinking of this that I realized how now, somehow, in some weird perverted way, I've been thrown to the other end of the spectrum at the same time. I've somehow managed to get involved with one-half of a classic couple many times, but the most recent has hurt the most.

More than the hurt that comes from being asked how my former beau is faring is the hurt that comes from being the new half of a former classic couple and being asked what happened to your predecessor.

And even more than that is the pain of almost being ignored because people still don't see you as being a part of the picture. It's still Wil and Laura ... and Evonne? Who is she?

I guess I can understand our situation a little more when I factor in the reality of all your groups and clubs where you and Laura held the highest ranks and were always in a position of his and hers, mr and mrs, king and queen, or just boyfriend and girlfriend.

But when you still live together and are still invited to parties as Wil and Laura the couple, it hurts. It hurts a lot. But hey, what can I do? After all, as far as most are concerned I'm non- existent! It really sucks having to listen to you while you're on the phone, explaining to someone who I am.

And then of course to continue with, "Well, she won't be there, but Laura and I will." What was the point in you two breaking up?

Maybe it's selfish ... or maybe I'm just way too jealous for my own good. But it just hurts so much to know that here I am, upset because someone who would have no way of knowing I broke up with Billy damn near two years ago asks me how he's doing ... but there you are, seemingly encouraging people to believe nothing with you has changed and that I am, in fact, not a player in your fantasy. Or if I am, I'm certainly not a major one.

I guess I feel ashamed. Are you really that embarrassed by me? Or is there just no other way around it? I guess I'll never really know. And will you eventually get back together with Laura? Are you perhaps using me to pass the time until the two of you work things out? I guess I wont know that until that day comes, and I hear those dreaded words ...

"Babydoll, You know I love you ... but Laura and I have been doing a lot of talking lately ... and ..."

Maybe it's immature and maybe it's one of those things that makes me seventeen. But I hope that if you do get back together with her or with anyone, should we ever break apart, that one day, just once, someone will ask you, "Hey ... how's Evonne?"

I'll love you always,

Evonne