I don't want to come off like I obviously have been lately. Have you ever had a crush on somebody? It's usually pretty fun. I kind of liked having a crush on you for a while... you know... when we were on speaking terms. Now that I'm pretty sure we're not even going to become acquaintances, I wish I could just abandon having feelings for you, but that's not as possible as I want it to be. I have to let the crush run its course. Not your fault; it's all mine. Still, don't you think you're overreacting a little bit? I know you don't want to encourage me, since you're not interested at all, but could you at least grant me a greeting on occasion? Let me know there are no hard feelings? I know there aren't any, but you're not showing that very well. I mean... it seriously looks like you hate me, and I know you don't; I didn't do anything bad enough to make you hate me. I hope. I just kind of came up to you, seeming very desperate, beyond nervous, and tried to see if you still wanted a prom date, and then if I'd see you over the weekend. Now you have to turn and face a blank wall when you walk by me in the hallways to make sure we don't make eye contact. I'd say hi, but something stops me every day. It's just that part of my brain that uses pure, unemotional logic. It says that, since you're avoiding me like the plague because I showed interest in you, saying hi would make it worse. I really do hate having to pass by you on a daily basis. It's just this constant reminder...

"Hey Jon! You know that attractive girl you were in that play with? Look what happens when you try to smile at her."

I mean... it's like that every day. Did I really screw up that bad? Didn't you feel at least a little flattered? But I guess life goes on. One more year and you won't even have to look at me ever again. I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable. I only meant to like you. I guess now it's too late, though.

Oh... and Jarom told me that you asked why I liked you. From the way he said it, it seemed like he was trying to show how much you wished I didn't. To be honest, I don't know exactly why I like/liked you. You just stand out from everybody else. You seem friendly. You seem to have a sense of humor. You seem to know how to have fun. You probably don't realize how beautiful other people see you as. I can't say who or how I know this, but I do know that somebody else wanted to ask you to the prom, too, but he found out that you weren't going through his friend. I'm not the only one who thinks you're cute, apparently. I guess that doesn't matter anymore, though. you're already repulsed by me. Too bad I'm never sending this letter, or maybe for once you'd get to hear a more thorough side of my story than what you can guess from how I act.

Jon